God fathered me through Facebook

Okay, so that's a stretch. How about, God gave man wisdom, who eventually created a program called Facebook where i was able to connect with a long lost, very special person from my past.? Through the wonders of technology, i connected to a man, whose father had an impact on me as an adolescent... more than 20 years ago.

I had been thinking of Stacey off and on throughout the years, always wanting to make contact with him. I wanted to thank him for spending time with me; for 'fathering me' when mine was away. Many years ago I sent him a letter to a last known address in another state - not knowing if he ever received it. Than a few months ago as I was searching people on Facebook I decided to put in his son's name - and I found him! I sent him a message, asking for his dad's email address and got it. And after about 25 years of not speaking to him... today we had lunch.

Stacey is his name and when I was somewhere around 11 he came into my life. He lived in the apartment below my mom and I. He would have been barely more than 30 himself. Not too long into our conversation today I asked him why he spent time with me. His answer was both insignificant, and very profound. He didn't think he was doing anything special. He recalls my mom may have asked him to invite me along when he went to do stuff - probably to give her a break. He thought he was just having me tag along; helping my mom out. But he was doing so much more.

He spent time with me. I would spend time with his three kids. That winter he took me with them on their family ski trip to Colorado. He took me a number of times to his family's farm in the summer. The memories just spilled over as we ate at a local restaurant. I can't sit here and rattle off life lessons Stacey taught me, or values he instilled in me. What I can tell you is that at a pivotal time in you youth, Stacey was a father figure for me.

I have been blessed to have other adult men who invested in me growing up. When i was younger I had regular visitation with my father, but it wasn't enough, and then he was stationed out of the country for a number of years and just gone. I was largely on my own to figure out how to be a boy, let alone be a man. And that has 'disaster' written on it from the start. But thank God for men like Mitch, Stacey, Jay T, and others who saw something in me...believed in me.

For those of you reading this, who share a similar story of a single parent home and the loss of an active father in your life... It is my desire that you also can reflect back to other men who spoke into your life during that crucial time of adolescence. Men who, without knowing it, filled some of that father-void your life. Take a moment and just sit in silence. Go back to those days of your youth. Ask God to reveal to you how He has fathered you as a boy. Who did he place in your life? If people come to mind, just bask in those memories. And then find them. Let them know what they meant to you. Thank them for their gift of time, validation, whatever it was for you. It took me about 25 years to find Stacey and it was all worth it.

And the next step for you, the step I've been thinking about doing since i left that restaurant today.... find a young boy to spend time with.