Behold The Lamb of God

So it's kind of late but i felt like posting a note before heading to bed. We just got home from the Behold The Lamb of God concert at our church. It's the Andrew Peterson and 'friends' tour. They're all singer-songwriters from Nashville who are either solo artists or members of bands like Sixpence and Caedman's Call and 2008 Dove Award winner Brandon Heath. Anyway, i really didn't know what to expect other than i assumed a night of Christmas songs. Boy, was i pleasantly wrong!

The first half was each member taking turns singing their own songs and getting to know their story. the second half was the actual Behold the Lamb of God album tour. and man was it fantastic. all but one or two songs were Andrew Peterson originals. you wouldn't immediately think - 'hey, this is a Christmas song.' Truthfully you could listen to this year around. what i found so profound about the songs were that they presented the Gospel; the story of Jesus' birth in a fresh way. you weren't distracted by singing the same ol' Jingle Bells, or even Oh, Holy Night where by now you don't even think about the words. These were in-your-face, this is the real deal kind of songs.
Both Tracy and i were moved by Jill Phillips singing Labor of Love. man, was THAT a powerful song about the night our Savior was born.

and where did these guys get all those istruments? some i've vaguely heard of, some i've never heard of or seen! Mandolins, lap steels, dobro, accordian, banjo, hammered dulcimer, B3... and others. there were at least 10 different guitars up there. I'm not sure what else to say. i was pleasantly surprised. the music was powerful, different, and gave me a refreshing picture of 'the reason for the season'. in fact, even saying that catch phrase does the music a disservice. before tonight i had only heard of one guy (Heath) - who's songs are currenlty being played on the Air-1 Christian station. But i walked out of there with 3 other CDs - wishing i could have bought everyone's music. i have become a new fan of Andrew Peterson, Jill Phillips, hubby Andy Gullahorn,Ben Shive, Brandon Heath, and Andrew Osenga. These are FANTASTIC songwriters and singers.

Seeing them up there brought back up some old feelings - dreams i had of one day being on the stage as a Christian artist. a dream i had long since put to bed out of fear (of failure). i'm not quitting my day job tomorrow - but it was nice to 'remember' that i did once have dreams and need to keep dreaming. life has a way of sucking dreams, aspirations, and visions out of you. it's a sad tragedy.

So, i am HIGHLY, HIGHLY, HIGHLY recommending "Behold The Lamd of God" - but get the 10th anniversay 2-CD set. yes the songs are great on their own merit, but disc two is a live version that takes it to the next level. if funny actually, all my life i've avoided 'live' albums cause i hated the clapping and cheering. but i can't recall the last concert i've been to when i've thought the studio-recorded CD was better than what i witnessed live. Check out Behold the Lamb... you won't be dissappointed!

Let it snow...

(*the photo above is used without permission - but hopefully okay with - my friend Steve in Colorado. Thank you Steve, keep the photos coming. it does my heart good.)

Okay, I realize it's been more than a month since my last post - just before the fall Wildmen KS boot camp. the quick explination (other than having an overflowing plate), is that i want to break away from 'schedules' where i can. I could submit an informative, educational 'lesson' blog every week for you, but that was never my intent. i wanted it to be much more personal than that - more authentic - more, 'me'. and to try and fit that desire into a structured box of 'weekly blogs' takes away the element of hearing from God and what HE wants me to write about. So, blogs will be posted in the Father's timing and not mine... i hope. That may be more than one in a week, or it may be a month or more.

And with that, and the reason i was just now prompted to write, was after viewing some photos a friend of mine from Colorado takes. And my heart just comes alive every time i see them. ever since the first time i went skiing on a youth group trip there is something about being in the snow-covered moutains that makes my heart leap. I remember as a Junior in high school i was deep into a 'poetry phase' in life. and i wrote a poem (that's long since been lost) about being a mountain slope and the sensory overload i felt. i can't tell you how the poem read, but that i was incapable of putting into words how being out there made me feel. For me, being on a mountain while it's snowing, especially, has got to be the closest i feel to the presence of God. Just writing these words brings a lump in my throat; emotions welling.

so of course i go to colorado whenever i can. fortunately for me, my favorite writer and the inspiration behind Wildmen KS, lives in Colorado and puts on camps there each year! I hope to be there again this next March, on the work crew of a boot camp.

But the "Colorado Effect" for me is a deep sense of wonder. is my yearning for Colorado driven by my own desire, or is the Father speaking to my heart? I want to move to Colorado, really badly. Is that of my heart, or God's? This is just one of those questions i've been wrestling with for the last couple years. i hope for snow here at home... lots of snow. it's like a surrogate for the real thing out west. the winter of '07, even the ice storm that knocked out our power for 5 days was a welcome experience for me. that winter we got more snow than i can recall having here in Kansas (in my lifetime). and it was beautiful. it was breath-taking. it was God speaking directly to my heart. i hope He has much to say this winter too.

Get Fired Up 2 weeks to Boot Camp

by Bob A Clifton

Can’t believe it is only two weeks out until the Wild at Heart Boot Camp. This is such an exciting time for me, and I bet for those of you who are coming it is a great time also. For those of you who have not been before, you might be experiencing some warfare right now that is a direct response to your attendance at this conference. For those of you who have been here before, maybe just excited about tucking away for a couple days. Shawn and I went to Colorado almost two years ago to experience our first boot camp. It was like changing.

I really want use my last blog before boot camp to share my experience with the Wild at Heart material. I ran into this material at a men’s bible study in Lawrence Kansas many years ago. I read the book and was hooked. Not hooked, at the time, on all of his ideas and concepts, but definitely on a few. The most influential chapter is the father wound. Chapter four makes clear that each one of us will take some kind of wounding from our father. I knew this was the case for me growing up, but didn’t understand that it was a big deal to take a closer look at this and do something about it. This book came at the same time as my daughter entered into the world. The very things I did not want to be doing with her were spilling out of my mouth with little control. By releasing some of those wounds in the past and asking for God to come in and heal up those tough places.

From the foundation of understanding that we are a product of our past I was able to move back into manhood. See, manhood seemed something of a mystery to me. I knew that we are supposed to get married, have kids, pay a mortgage, and die. What I didn’t understand that with the relationship that I would have in Christ it would bring warfare into my home. Spiritual warfare is the product of the relationship we have with Jesus Christ. When we became sons of the living God Satan could no longer steal our heart away from Him. What Satan can do is destroy our lives and our witness if we spend our time in and of the world instead of following our Father.

When I figured this out so many of my trials began to make good sense. I had drawn the conclusion that bad things were happening to me because I did not know how to do things right. I must not be reading my bible enough, or praying enough. I thought I must have done something wrong and so now I am experiencing God’s punishment for all the bad I did in my life. What Eldredge did a great job of explaining is that we are in a battle whether we like it or not. We can either choose to take our position in that battle or we can pretend that it is not happening around us. As soon as I got a grasp of this and started stepping into the battles that were designed for me, the guilt and shame of a failed life made more sense.

This is a brief glimpse of some great things that have come out of this material. For those of you that are joining us in two weekends, I am praying for you. I am praying that God would show up in your life and speak in some divine ways. I am also praying that you would be able to soak in the material you are supposed to and go home to execute what it is God shared with you this week. I am anticipating with excitement getting to know each one of you at a deeper level and be an encouragement to what I hope will be a life changing experience.

Get Fired Up!

Fighting Resignation

by Shawn Martin

there is much i could blog about today - having come off a particularly great weekend; a great evening out with co-workers, our high school football team remaining undefeated, my son winning his first game of the season, having dinner with some men from my small group, or that more men continue to sign up for the boot camp. This morning in court, something caught my attention and reminded me i hadn't yet posted the blog for today. i'm sensing that i should then write about that. i wish that it was something as positive as the weekends events. sadly, it's not.

case after case that i watch come through court is a clear picture of fathers' continued absence and passivity in the lives of their families. Continually abdicating their true selves. the 'anti-vision' of a familiar ministry: they've embraced passivity, denied responsibility, lead cowardly, and believe there's no greater reward.

this morning the parents were found to be actively using illegal substances and in eminent risk of losing custody of their children, immediately. the Judge, visibly angry, demanded a response from either parent as to why they deserved to have their children. the mother spoke. she sobbed. she pleaded for another chance to prove herself. the father? not a word. he simply stood there, trying to avoid eye contact.

being a man myself, i can identify with his plight. being called on the carpet. made aware of his failure. his inadequacy made public. being asked to present immediate evidence as to why he's worthy. to show he has what it takes (yikes! that feeling hits close to home doesn't it?). he chooses not to fight. refuses to defend his integrity or even to throw himself on the mercy of the court. he did something much worse... nothing.

he denied responsibility and embraced passivity. there was no fight in his eyes, only shame. i wonder if he feels there is anything worth fighting for. i see it in the men all around me, and in humble admission, within myself. the Father is in need of warriors.

men, there's little more than 2 weeks before the fall Boot Camp. it is very exciting. even as i'm writing this Bob called to say there may be some other men committing to attend. the numbers are slowly rising. i am excited for the encounter (i pray) men are about to have with the Father. the new found freedom they'll leave with. it won't get easier. in many ways the battle becomes harder. eyes will be opened to see life for what it really is. but it'll be through eyes of greater clarity, purpose, freedom, and fire.

Registration closes in THREE days men. it is our desire to see every man walking in this message. cultivating a relationship with the Father. finding their true selves from Him and living out of that truth, strength and courage. Battle. Adventure. Beauty. Eldredge reminds us, the story of our life is the long, sustained assault on our heart by the one who know what we can become... and FEARS us.

Please be in prayer for the Team over the next three weeks. that God would give us the words to speak, the wisdom to follow His leading, and that mens' hearts will be prepared and open to receive the life He longs for us to have.

Pay Attention to Prompting

by Bob A Clifton

I am not one to pay much attention to end times. Even starting out this blog like that brings embarrassment. This is something God tells us to keep an eye on all the time. I remember my wife really digging into the subject a couple years ago when the Left Behind series came out. I enjoyed listening to her give me the summed up version of what was going on as the latest book would come out and the story would unfold farther. I am thinking of different friends over the years that have spent time in Revelations wanting to understand some of the end time mysteries. Honestly I always am pretty skeptical of people who look to closely into this stuff.

Well in the last ten days, not by my prompting, have ended up in four conversations about the end times. A couple people asking some questions, an associate of mine sending me a video, and then a breakfast where a close friend had a heavy burden about some things he sees unfolding in the world right now. Then I crack my bible today to prepare for an upcoming bible study and am led to Hebrew 10:25.

Let us not give up on meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another-and all the more as you see the Day approaching

Catch that last part? Incredible I thought. One thing I have learned in the last couple years of my walk with Christ is to pay attention to what is going on around me. Not like slipping off of a curb, but understanding how he is trying to get my attention. This issue that has come up with the end times has been a good example of other things that he has brought up and wanted me to pay more attention to. I love this interaction from him. Times like this are the easiest for me to see him loving on me. He knows I am pretty thick in the head so when he wants to get a point across or bring up something for me to look into, he hits hard!

Do you have ways in place for discerning when God has something he wants to speak to you? Always remember that God is always communicating with us. If we have a heart for the Father and are open to his leading, we will often understand what he wants to tell us. His relationship with us is very similar to that of a loving father, here on this planet. Some things you can expect from Christ include:

1. His delight. Do you know what it is to experience someone delighting in you? My boss stopped in yesterday to tell me how much she enjoys me and my enthusiasm. Now you need to know my boss is repelled at the idea of being touchy feely, so this was a big step. Recently, and only very recent have I started experiencing God’s delight in me. I sat out on my porch last night and watched a thunderstorm roll through. I just found myself saying thanks, God knows how much I love the elements like snow, rain, sleet, and anything intense.

2. Correction. Our Father is interested enough in you to set loving limits. When we choose not to live within his system and go toward sin we can expect him to correct us. It may not come in the form we grew up with, but it will come.

3. Direction. Do you see that God is leading you in a certain way right now? Who and what is he using to bring direction to your life. Just today a close friend of mine was told that her contract would end on July 15. Obviously on the surface that seems like a pretty sad deal, but what I like is the way God uses those moments to make clear his direction.

4. Relationships. Just as I experienced the revelation God wanted to reveal to me, he will often do that through our close relationships. The bible is makes so clear that our church participation is critical for us to be encourage and be encouraged by the relationships he has put in our life.

5. His Word. Enough said! You have to be in his Word to be clear about his prompting.

There are so many other ways, but pay attention this week to how he is prompting you.

Have her back by 10:00

By Shawn Martin

A great weekend is coming to a close. My church's yearly mens retreat was friday evening to Saturday noon. It's always a great time. This year we had a team event called a 'mantathlon' and the team i was on, the Chest Hairs, took first! The massive steaks we have on the Friday night are amazing.

After the camp out i went home to get ready for my son's football game and i was somewhat anxious. Not about the game but who i was meeting at the game. It was my daughter's new boyfriend. man, do i not wanna deal with this. I would love for all my kids to be focused only on acedemics all through school (including college) before they tread the murky and painful waters of romantic relationships. And she's already had her share of heartache. Unfortunately i was right about each of them from the start. Teenage boys haven't changed in the 20 years since i was one and i knew all the games and angles. So i don't think she could bring any guy home that i wasn't convinced just wanted to get in her pants.

But back to the story. She told me a week ago her boyfriend wanted to meet me so i decided to make it a family afair. invite them both to her brother's football game then home for pizza. i ended up having to hold one of the first down markers during the game, but i half time i went and shook his hand. He had a good grip. that was a plus. back at home we kept it light and humorous. i have to admit, i also wanted him to apporve of us; think we were cool.

After some small talk they left. it wasn't more than a couple minutes later that my daughter 'texted' me, "Do you like him?" It was so important for me not to 'over protect' her like i had done the previous boys i knew were after one thing. emotional protecting turned into lecturing about how dad knows how it's going to play out.

in his book, She Calls Me Daddy, Robert Wolgemuth speaks to interviewing dates/potential suitors. i have non-residential joint custody of my daughter so i didn't have the opportunity to have the physical influence i wanted with her 'dating', but had, i'd do it like Wolgemuth. All boys were interviewed by him. He gives a fantastic story of one such interview in the book; quite humorous too. But joking aside, "This is an intimate thing between you and her. She's trusting you by 'letting' you talk to her boyfriends. Don't abuse that priviledge. Remember this interview is not about your approval of your daughters choice in boys. Every boy passes your inspection, regardless. (Gulp.) The very fact that the interview is going to take place will have a sorting affect by itself."

Back up! EVERY boy passes? That's a hard pill to swallow. But i knew the way i 'told you so' to previous boyfriends had little positive effect. So i sized the new boyfriend up in my mind, but spoke none of it to her. he actually seemed like a 'good kid' anyway. and though i knew, as a 17-year-old boy, he will have sex on his mind... i had 'the talk' with my daughter and periodically the subject comes up. there's nothing knew i can tell her. she knows what's right and where i stand. i have to trust that she will make the right choices. hopefully she will, but if she doesn't...i'll still love her and support her. that's what it's about anyway. pouring into her life and giving her no doubt of her personal worth and beauty. The more you do that, the less you have to worry about boys. she'll respect herself too much to settle for less.

Courage

by Bob A Clifton

Courage

In a recent opportunity at Ft. Riley I had the opportunity to listen to Dr. Charles Smith. Dr. Smith is a professor, author, and speaker for Kansas State Research Extension. His most recent book is titled “Raising Courageous Kids”. After 9/11 Dr. Smith started asking the question of what gives people courage to do heroic things. Dr. Smith read countless stories of people rising up and being heroes in the midst of a tragic scene. Dr. Smith wandered why some people went down the stairs to save their own life for 9/11 and why other people went up the stairs to try to save another life. From that questioned spawned the idea of this book. How do we raise and create a courageous kids?

The root word of courage, originating from a French word, is divided into two parts. The first being “cour”, which means heart. The second part is “age”, meaning action; heart action being the total meaning of courage. I thought this was brilliant. Something Dr. Smith brought up was that all heroism involves acts of courage. As I thought about this two word meaning, I began wandering what it would mean to have one or another. I often have action that does not involve heart. I can even say, sadly, some of my movement toward other people have involved action without the heart. I can also say that I have had heart about many things, but had no action to back that heart up.

Something he said that really grabbed my attention is what I will focus on today. Dr. Smith said “all courage has overcoming fear as an element.” This really struck me, not only to teach children but more for our daily walk with Christ. 1 Peter 4:1 says”

Therefore, since Christ has suffered in his body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude, because he who has suffered in his body is done with sin.

I got to thinking on my way home that it takes courage to live this Christian life. I mean really live this life. A recent initiative at my job has led me into a relationship with a young lady that is absolutely opposed to the Christian faith. I have thoroughly enjoyed our discussions, debates, and disagreements. She is a fire ball of world optimism, global issue awareness, feminine rights, and opposition of religion, especially Jesus Christ. Honestly it has been a long time since I have been in relationship with someone that has this strong of a belief pattern. Since being at home my opportunities to interact with people who oppose Christianity has lessened. This has been such an eye opener to the task at hand in bringing the gospel to the world.

I typically don’t think of myself as a very courageous person. I leave that title for martyr’s, our incredible military, and children who do miraculous feats. But what does God think? Is he proud when I show “heart action” at work? I could easily pass on the struggle of what that conversation is going to bring. Knowing that in this day and age it will be easy for her to find people that side with her and give affirmation to her belief system. Does it take courage to go home and be present as a dad after a long day at work? What about talking to the teenager at church that is isolated and struggling to fit in.

I wander where God needs you to have “heart action”. I am thinking of a place in your life where God is going to have to come through in order for you to be successful. A battle that is not small, but a battle that is beyond your own strength and comfort to come through. Could be a relationship at work, or it could simply be engaging your wife that has been upset with you for weeks. So many places are built for men to have courage, and unlike any other time in history so desperately needed. What would it mean for you to have courage today?

Getting broken to avoid self-centeredness

by Shawn Martin

"True strength does not come out of bravado. Until we are broken, our life will be self-centered, self-reliant; our strength will be our own. So long as you think you are really something in and of yourself, what will you need God for? I don’t trust a man who hasn’t suffered; I don’t let a man get close to me who hasn’t faced his wound. Think of the posers you know—are they the kind of man you would call at 2:00 A.M., when life is collapsing around you? Not me. I don’t want clichés; I want deep, soulful truth, and that only comes when a man has walked the road I’ve been talking about. As Frederick Buechner says,

To do for yourself the best that you have it in you to do—to grit your teeth and clench your fists in order to survive the world at its harshest and worst—is, by that very act, to be unable to let something be done for you and in you that is more wonderful still. The trouble with steeling yourself against the harshness of reality is that the same steel that secures your life against being destroyed secures your life also against being opened up and transformed. (The Sacred Journey)

Only when we enter our wound will we discover our true glory. As Robert Bly says, “Where a man’s wound is, that is where his genius will be.” There are two reasons for this. First, the wound was given in the place of your true strength, as an effort to take you out. Until you go there you are still posing, offering something more shallow and insubstantial. And therefore, second, it is out of your brokenness that you discover what you have to offer the community. The false self is never wholly false. Those gifts we’ve been using are often quite true about us, but we’ve used them to hide behind. We thought that the power of our life was in the golden bat, but the power is in us. When we begin to offer not merely our gifts but our true selves, that is when we become powerful." (Wild at Heart , 137–38)

And why do we hide? Fear, aboviously - on many fronts. of not having control. not having the answers. of not measuring up. of not being as talented as the next guy. of our own limitations. fear of not having what it takes. where have we heard that before? In his book, Desire, John says a man's deepest desires always relate to his strength, one way or another... no matter how much a man achieves it is never enough, everyone expects you to do it again and again. that's why a man's worst fear is not measuring up. i can identify with all of those fears, even moreso with the 'what if' fears. if IFs and BUTs were candy and nuts, we'd all have a Merry Christmas, right? i will 'what if' myself out of so many decisions. instead of trusting what God is able to do, i worry about what MIGHT happen. are some of you like that? it's sad really, that fear often replaces faith. faith knows no fear. faith is trust and trusting God with the outcome.

right now i have some simmering fear over the upcoming Boot Camp. It was a huge success last September. then we had to turn around and cancel the February camp due to too few registrations. now as were are 6 weeks out from the October camp the Enemy wants to use that fear again. you won't get enough guys. you'll need to cancel again. you'll look foolish. what kind of ministry if this anyway? you might as well quit. some of you may know a similar scenario. but God is good, i know that. this message is good, i believe in it. men need this message, i've seen it. so i resist the Devil and his lies. and i trust God with the results. i don't give into fear.

Search for the Glory

by Bob A Clifton

Raising children is interesting. For those of you that have children and jobs and wives, you know the complexity you experience in managing all of those and still finding sometime for yourself. As you have heard me talk about, transitioning to work has been a difficult process. Even when you change one good thing for another good thing, you still have a grieving process for giving up the good you had. Got all that good? As I sit here today I have a card pinned in front of me from my daughter. For church during Fathers Day the kids got to write cards to their fathers. My daughter simply wrote “We love you. You are the best. When you are at work I miss you.” Fantastic! Did you notice as she wrote those words the only thing she thinks about, at this point as a seven year old, is all of dad’s good qualities?

This reminds me of how our Father see’s us. He is always checking out our best qualities. Growing up, my life did not resemble someone always searching out my best qualities. Sparing you the details of the brokenness, my mother came from a home that was full of verbal abuse. When you grow up in an environment that is full of bad words, it is real hard to think of and express the good you see in other people. So for much of my childhood I have memories of my mom pointing out what was wrong with me. I still see some of this today. It is not that many people would view this as bad, but it is easy to see when you were a part of that for years.

Early on in my parenting I took note of the same expression that came from past generations. The expression of what was wrong with my daughter instead of what was right. I was fortunate enough to catch up with that early on and have been able to repent and correct that place in my heart. Just last week a wife told me that it feels so fake complimenting someone when all they have done is everyday stuff. When we get down to the details, if someone has not poured compliments into our life, we are going to have a hard time pouring life into someone else.

Dr. Larry Crabb’s latest book called Connecting brings this point home. Dr. Crabb brings attention to what we see in people. He says that western Christianity is so focused on finding the sin, exposing it, and then bringing accountability around it that it sometimes will miss the glory of someone. Crabb says “why do we so infrequently delight in one another? Its people who don’t know us well that often finds the most to appreciate in us.” I think we see people on television or someone across the street that seems to have the car, house, wife, and smile and we think what went wrong. How did people delight in you when you were younger? Is it easy for you delight in other people and express that to them?

Being delighted in is the main emotional task for a 0 to 3 year old. One of the ways that we develop is by being delighted in as infants. When we have a lot of eye to eye contact with our parents and see many smiles it makes us feel like our world is safe. When we do not have much face time with mom and dad or if our time is full of mad and sad faces we feel like our world is unsafe. Amazing that the age when we usually bear children is the same time we are working harder than ever and finding our place in the work market. With the increase in two parent incomes it can become a difficult task to delight in your children as much as you would like too.

Can I make a suggestion this week? Instead of finding the sin in people, just look for their glory. When you find their glory, let it be known what you see. This, I believe, was Jesus biggest strength in building community and relationships with others. He called out people’s glory and created ways for people to shine. Some of the best days of my life are surrounded with praise and affirmation from people I care about. I am reminded anymore when people compliment me of the work that Christ has done and is doing in my life. Find something to delight in this week!

We hold the key

I look forward to my church's 'Baptism Sunday'. We have two or three a year and it's quite a big deal. When each person rises out of the water the whole congregation jumps to their feet and cheers like we were watching the Chiefs actually win a game. It's a time for tears as you listen to each testimony.

The youngest one this morning looked barely old enough to read and his written testimony was only a few sentence long. It was short and to the point. Oh, the innocence and wonder of child-like faith. I sat there and watched the beaming faces of the parents who were standing near by. Their son did not come to faith by attending Sunday School for one hour a week. My bet is he received the bulk of his foundation elsewhere.

In the story of David and Goliath we read an interesting inquiry. Just prior to the fight King Saul approaches on of David's brothers and asks, "What sort of family does this young fellow come from?" (1 Samuel 17:55 TLB). Why do you think he asks that question? I have a theory.

In his book, The Most Important Place on Earth, Robert Wolgemuth says of raising godly children, "You get one shot at this homebuilding thing. Only one. And time is not on your side." The most important place on earth is a Christian home, according to Wolgemuth - and i would agree. Sadly, gone is the era of Little House on the Prairie or even Leave it to Beaver. Parents and kids just don't interact together anymore. We're too busy. Teens have minimal social skills because their friendships are largely driven by texting. Email, cell phones, and soccer have replaced family interaction.

A far cry from today's parent-child conversations about "God" is found in Deuternomy 6. "These commandment that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress then on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk on the road, when you lie down and when you get up...Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates." (v. 6-9)

There it is again.. the home. It all starts in the home. Saul asked about David's home. Personally I think we have amazing teachers in our Chidren's Ministry at church. But even the best can't effectively grow our kids' faith in the hour a week they have. The burden remains on us, as parents the remaining 6 days and 23 hours.

Many of us don't know what a Christian home looks like. I was raised in the church but i couldn't say my home was any different than the next. That is no disrespect to my mom who did her best to raise me on her own. Her childhood - at home - was worse. The chain has to be broken and it must start with us. You don't need all the answers, but simply the commitment to make a change and the humility to ask the Father for help. You can't do it without him anyway.

It's hard work guys. Nothing worth having is easy. Be intentional about every opportunity. It may only be 5 minutes at breakfast. It's a start. Don't eat in silence. Ask your kids questions. Enter their world. Eat dinner together. Talk about your day, ask them about theirs. Mention something that reminded you of God, or a situation you are needing guidance on (and that you prayed about it). Ask a child to say the dinner blessing. Spend a few minutes with them at bedtime. Find little ways to show your children that God is very real and part of your life every day. This is more difficult if you have older teens because they are now realizing they have all the answers and you are stupid - but that's another blog. The point is to just start. I want my kids to have a stronger faith than I by the time they leave the house. We only get one shot. "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." Proverbs 22:6

Might As Well Win

by Bob A Clifton

I accepted the job. Then I told Lance something shocking. “I think we should focus on the Tour de France,” I said. “Okay,” said Lance. “Which stages? I can win a few stages.” “No,” I said. “I want to see you on the podium. I want to win the whole thing.” Lance said nothing for a moment. Years later he would tell me, “I thought it was far-fetched, but at that point I had nothing to lose.” “Look,” I said, “If we’re going to ride the Tour, we might as well win.” Finally, Lance said, “Sure. Okay, let’s do it. Let’s win the Tour de France.”

"We Might As Well Win" by Johan Bruyneel

Anyone who knows me at all knows that July is my favorite month of the year. Starting at the top of July and ending 20 plus days later is the greatest event the world has ever known. The Tour de France! For most of us in the states, and especially Kansas, cycling is not a big sport. So, this makes me an odd duck out and few friends to talk to about this fantastic sporting spectacle. Since I was a kid I followed the great bicycle race. I remember Greg LeMond winning the Tour in the mid 90’s. Then the greatest Spanish cyclist won the event five times in a row named Miguel Indurain. Then along came Lance Armstrong which turned the world of cycling upside down. Not only would he go on to win seven tours in a row, but he would do it after defeating cancer.

Knowing that for some people Lance Armstrong has become controversial in his execution of this many wins in a row, I tell this story with caution. The point that struck me in his manager’s book is this idea of the win. Johan makes the comment at the beginning of the book that if we are going to do this we might as well win. Probably not knowing who Johan Bruyneel is; just understand he is the one of the greatest cycling managers and tacticians that has ever been a part of cycling. He has authored how teams go about finding cyclist to fill their team roster and win big races. So when Bruyneel says they might as well win, people now take note.

Do you ever think of your life this way? In a book by Andy Stanley he talks about ministry; specifically clarifying the win. If we do not clarify the win in our ministry we may not know what we are working towards. Not only we will not be sure of what we are working towards, but we have no idea to know whether or not we succeeded in what we are doing.

A new mentor relationship I have with a young man in our church has brought this idea back to the surface for me. He in an incredible witness for Jesus, and has brought some people to a relationship with Christ in the last couple months. He has an incredible ability to initiate relationships and invite people to church. For me, it has been a breath of fresh air to sit in Sunday school with him while we teach new believers what it means to be a new Christian. One of the things him and I work out before each class is to determine “what the win” would be for the day. This last week, him being new at teaching in this setting, it was to relax and be himself. He did it! He focused on that in his preparation before the class got there, spent more time just helping everyone else relax and then he was able to. I was super proud of the way he handled himself and executed his plan.

We won’t win every time, but it we still should know what we are shooting for. What plan do you need to execute? Clarify a win with your wife? What does your wife need from you right now? Clarify a win for the holidays. Coming through with gifts and ideas for our family can be a big step in building a relationship or encouraging someone.

Counting on Our Vanity and Blindness

"Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans." John Lennon


"The core of Satan’s plan for each of us is not found in tempting us with obvious sins like shoplifting or illicit sex. These things he uses more as maintenance strategies. His grand tactic in separating us from our heart is to sneak in as the Storyteller through our fears and the wounds we have received from life’s Arrows. He weaves a story that becomes our particular “Message of the Arrows.” Counting on our vanity and blindness, he seduces us to try to control life by living in the smaller stories we all construct to one degree or another. He accuses God to us and us to God. He accuses us through the words of parents and friends and God himself. He calls good evil and evil good and always helps us question whether God has anything good in mind in his plans for us. He steals our innocence as children and replaces it with a blind naïveté or cynicism as adults.

At the same time Satan is at work reinterpreting our own individual stories in order to make God our enemy, he is also at work dismantling the Sacred Romance—the Larger Story God is telling—so that there is nothing visible to take our breath away. He replaces the love affair with a religious system of dos and don’ts that parches our hearts and replaces our worship and communion services with entertainment. Our experience of life deteriorates from the passion of a grand love affair, in the midst of a life-and-death battle, to an endless series of chores and errands, a busyness that separates us from God, each other, and even from our own thirstiness.

Part of Satan’s grand strategy of separating us from our heart, once Jesus has drawn us to an awareness of being his sons and daughters through believing faith, is to convince us that our heart’s desires are at core illegitimate. (The Sacred Romance, 107–9)"

Repair

by Bob A Clifton

Unlike any position I have been in since high school I have some older vehicles. My wife and I, in attempts to break out our Dave Ramsey skills on our budget, have taken to not having the newest toys. For this reason we have two cars with high mileage and my mower I own for my mowing business is struggling along this year. Something I have been pretty uncomfortable with in the past is maintenance. I have always taken the road that I would rather have a payment instead of a broken down car on the side of the road. This has brought many opportunities of repair. My most recent repairs included the tailgate on my truck, a couple boards that were busted on our deck, and a window in our home. Pretty cool that when I repaired these things it made me feel great. Kind of like an accomplishment if you will.

Did you know that relationships are no different? Relationships need repair. Recently a friend and myself attended a workshop that talks about attachment to children. In order to keep good attachment with children, and for any other important relationship, is to repair the relationship when it is broken. Watch this!

Whenever we experience conflict with someone we have a break in the relationship. One of the biggest predictors of marital success is how that relationship is fixed after conflict. What happens after the argument? Typically you will hear of people fighting and then they don’t talk for two or three days, and then everything seems to be fine. But it is not! It is really not fine! When there is no repair in the relationship there is a minor, and sometimes major, break in the relationship. You may not even notice for years because the incidents seem so minor. Add ten years of minor breaks up and all the sudden you have two people that aren’t as open with each other. Make that twenty years and now maybe they don’t share the same bed anymore. In thirty years, and the kids are gone, they may find out they don’t even know each other anymore. This lack of repair sets up a perfect scenario for that relationship to not exist.

This happened with my daughter last week. Dad was tired and in no place to deal with drama. Drama got up out of bed a couple times because she could not fall asleep. My daughter could see that I was frustrated with her and started apologizing for not being able to sleep. A break in the relationship occurred. Dad was upset and could not be there for her since her situation seemed silly for her age. Knowing there was a break in the relationship I called her on my way to work the next morning. I needed to repair the break that took place for us the night before. It is two easy words to say that seem to struggle coming out of our mouth. “I’m sorry.” I think when we apologize and admit fault it takes some transparency and vulnerability. It is hard to be wrong; but it is critical to fess up when we are.

Similar to repairing my home and cars, I feel a sense of accomplishment when I repair an important relationship. I love to enjoy the company of my family and friends without a rift in the relationship. I know Satan uses this all the time to set couples, families, and churches against each other. He is sly enough to not cause division after one conversation, but usually after many. He is patient and will allow us to think that the conflict is all better if it does not come up again. Know that it is there and know the bible has made it clear not to go to sleep without taking care of the conflict we have.

Any relationships in your life that need some repair? How do you need to go after that this week?

Family Vacation

by Shawn Martin

Just got back from vacation today. The 'fam' and I just spent the last 5 days in Colorado!! Boy does my heart come alive there, men. It's my selfish desire that the Father will bring me there someday, permanently. As such, the last 5 days were less than 'ideal' for me. We were in Colorado, in a cabin, in the woods, secluded from much, as a FAMILY. With my camera in hand, I could spend all day, alone, snapping shots of God's beautiful creation. Telling the kids to be quiet so as not to scare away the deer, elk, squirrels, etc. It was a daily choice to will myself to enter their world and enjoy them as opposed to trying to keep them out of mine. The first night at the cabin I asked my son to say the prayer before eating, out on the deck, near sunset, next to the hot tub... oops. i got sidetracked again. But seriously, my son's prayer consisted of thanking God for giving us this awesome vacation to this awesome place, etc.

I knew this kind of vacation is right up my son's alley. He'd be right there with me out in the wilderness. The girls - that's another story. They wanted to shop. To even suggest that we actually stay AT the cabin the entire time would not have been well received. So, you compromise. We spent the days in 'town'; colorado springs, manitou springs, Royal Gorge, etc, and the evenings at the cabin. We all got something we liked. I still managed to snap about 400 pictures.

Another mindset I changed - for the first time - was the need to get to where we were going on time, or better yet, ahead of time. I'd get upset when we had to make an extra bathroom stop... AGAIN. I didn't do any of that this time and guess what? It was a much more enjoyable drive. All those years of stress and resentment cause we couldn't make a nonstop drive for four or twelve hours straight. ha!

It was good for me to lighten up this last week. I wasn't perfect by any means gentlemen. I struggled with my need to control my surroundings (ie. control my kids' behavior), but I made some great progress and reaped the benefits of it. I was able to enjoy Colorado with my family instead of just enjoying Colorado.

So for this blog I'm not offering encouragement, or insight as we typically try to do. I just wanted to share alittle about me and how i'm just like anyone else. This 'walking with God' thing doesn't make me any better off than the next guy. It's tough. It's hard. I'm still in my infancy as it relates to leaving behind the legalism and learning to love and be loved by the Father. It's worth the fight and hard work for sure. I'm in it for the long haul and I hope you are too.

Have a great week men!

I Can't Go There

by Bob A Clifton

By the time you are reading this it is a month past. I have had some heavy things on my mind, so I blogged about them in advance of the date you are reading these. One of those things was a particular bible passage I ended up in for my quiet time this morning. The passage is Luke 18:34. The passage reads like this in the New Testament:

The disciples did not understand any of this. Its meaning was hidden from them, and they did not know what he was talking about.

Back up a few verses and we see the backdrop for this revelation. Jesus and the disciples are in the midst of ministry. Jesus just got through telling a rich man that it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter heaven. What appears to be a brief break in the midst of much ministry, Jesus shares a truth with only the disciples. He explains to them that we are on our way to Jerusalem and the Son of Man will be turned over, beaten, and then killed.

I really struggled with this verse this morning. When you look at parallel references to this verse, no other verse explains these truths as being “hidden” from the disciples. More or less, other scripture references say they did not understand what in the world he was talking about. Well why?

I ended up in a conversation with a friend this week that seems similar to this situation. Some things had unfolded in a close relationship of theirs. Some things were said, some gossip was spread, and now he is hearing it from a 3^rd, 4^th, and 5^th person. Not good! The way they explained it to me was “I am really angry at this person”. Problem is my friend struggles with confronting people. What I explained as standing up for a little of who they are. When I brought up the idea of saying something to the person that created the offense you could see the sirens going off in their head. No way!

Just like the disciples in Luke, my friend was not in a place to hear what God may want them to do. They prayed, but in the midst of the prayer had already formulated an action plan that would keep confrontation out of the picture. In the book I was talking about in my previous blog, it said that we spend half of our time learning how not to fear and the other half learning to unwind what we already fear. When we fear, do you really think we hear God and what he is trying to say to us?

Not that I have an answer, but it definitely made me think about what is hidden from me because I choose not to go there. Most of the commentaries on this verse say that the disciples were so focused on the God’s glory; they didn’t even see that suffering would be a part of that mix. Like I said before, I can’t speak as an expert on this, but I know some of the things that have helped pull things into the light in my past that I was trying to keep tucked away.

1. Do you have a good friend? Not just someone that listens to you, but someone that gets in your business. These friends are tough to find. I have been enjoyed this kind of relationship with a good friend of mine in Lawrence for a couple years now. Calls my life to the carpet all of the time. I thought that kind of friend would be painful, but it has turned out to be a cool drink of water in a desert like world. I have recently been enjoying that same friendship with a guy in Topeka. We get together once a week and let our kids play in the park while we dig into each other’s lives in open and transparent ways. I have enjoyed his boldness and willingness to speak truth to me in my tough places.

2. Do you read your bible? I mean do you open up scripture in anticipation of what God will want to share? Daily intake is critical in this area. To take in scripture one time a week or month will not give the Father enough room to speak in ways he may want to come after you; meaning go after your heart. If you struggle knowing where to get started, pick up a bible reading plan. They are in the front or back of most bibles. If not there check out the internet, you will find plenty.

3. Prayer. Not the prayer you can jabber while driving down the road for 10 miles not even knowing what you might have said. Prayer like asking God to open up places in your heart that you have shut him out. I like to ask God if there is anything he may wants to say this part of me.

I struggled with this verse this morning because hiding things is a coping mechanism for people that do not have anyone to trust. If you are a believer in Jesus Christ, and have asked him to come into your heart then you can trust Him. He will go after things in your heart that you may not want to have anything to do with. He may reveal things that you do not want to hear. Just remember, since we have a loving Father he is not here to punish us, but to grow us up. Let him speak whatever he wants to say and then go after those parts that he brings up. Step down into the pit and face the mental lion in your life.

Hearing from God

by Shawn Martin

Over the last many months i've been having a reoccuring themed dream. I won't tell you specifics here, but it's a good dream. It speaks to my heart's desire. Sometimes it's content is more vague than others but last night it was quite vivid and the 'best' one so far. I know 'what' the dream is about for the most part, but I don't know what the 'meaning' is.

So I'm on my way to church this morning. I'm praying in the car and at the end, the dream comes to mind. I'm just down the road from church and I begin to wonder if God speaks through dreams. I'm reminded of some Old Testament scriptures regarding God speaking through dreams, so I know he DID. But I ask to myself, does God STILL speak through dreams. And what I'm really fishing for is whether or not He is speaking through these dreams i'm having. So i'm indirectly asking the Father about my dream(s). He knows my heart's longing.

I get to church, sing some good worship songs, learn a new one, take communion and the Pastor steps up to begin the message. Today we start a new series that begins with Genesis 37. You know what the title of chapter 37 is.... "Joseph's Dreams". Clearly the Father is answering my question. I smile inside. I could dwel on the still 'unknown meaning' of my dream -but I simply enjoy the 'warm fuzzy' that is God showing me he hears me.

I have many stories like this and i hope you do too.

When it comes to hearing from God, we have to start with the assumption (reality) that He still speaks; in a conversational way. It is not reserved for the elite or devout; the Moses', Davids, Pauls or Jesus himself. And it's not just Old Testament stuff. In John 16:12 Jesus is telling the Disciples He has much more to say to them - more than they could then bear. He would be speaking to them through the Holy Spirit later on after he leaves them. This is just one passage - New Testament - that reveals Jesus and God the Father want to speak to us; LONG to speak to us; each and every one of us, still.

Secondly we have to believe that it is ours to hear his voice. He wants to speak to each and every one of us. John 10 speaks of the Shepherd and his sheep. He calls the sheep and they know his voice; hear his voice, and follow him. Jesus speaks to us. Not just to the Billy Grahams or other spiritual leaders.

Once you realize the first two fundamentals, what's left is to begin to tune into your heart. That's where Jesus is, right? Ephesians 3:17 - Jesus dwells in our hearts by faith. We ask him to come into our hearts when we 'accept Christ'. That's where he speaks to us. We don't audibly hear him. He is not an external voice in the room. The voice comes from inside us, within our heart.

That's the foundation to hearing from God. And unless He has something else in mind for me to talk about in two weeks, i'll continue on with what's next. 'Okay, i believe He still speaks. I believe He speaks to me. So now i've gotta tune into my heart - how do I do that?!' I hope to discuss that next time.

What’s Your Battle?

Bob A Clifton

A recent book I picked up has led me to a little nugget of scripture that I think is great. In 2 Samuel 23:20 it talks of a valiant fighter from Kabzeel named Benaiah. Benaiah is displayed in the bible as having some mighty feats. One of which is just part of verse 20. The text simply says “he also went down into a pit on a snowy day and killed a lion.” Pretty simple, but let’s take a closer look.

First, what would it mean to kill a lion? We see a couple stories in the bible of a lion being killed by a lion, but this is not common activity today unless done from a distance with a gun in hand. Now I imagine perfect weather for killing lions would be 75 degrees, maybe partly cloudy so the sun does not create a glare while the lion is coming at you 35 miles per hour. Take note, Benaiah went down into a snowy pit. Snowy usually means slick. Slick, cold, and hungry lion do not sound like the challenge I am looking for these days. Benaiah was brave enough to not only kill a lion, but to step down into a slippery pit to get the job done.

Just camp out on this thought for a moment! If the lion is in a pit this means I got a pretty good shot at escaping. I will not have to kill anything to get on my way. Not that I know, but I can’t imagine lion is good food for the hungry. What a man’s man!

This led to his question he posed in the book; what kind of lion are you facing these days? Something in life you are looking at and thinking “no way”! There is no way I can take that on. I will stick to smaller battles and leave that one alone. Maybe stick to something you can do in your own strength. Could be something you have calculated and know that victory is inevitable. Possibly you are choosing many smaller battles so you stay busy and create the feeling that you are succeeding. What is your big battle right now?

A recent job transition has brought on a big battle for me. I have transitioned away from staying home with my two children to full time work. It has been over six years since I worked a full time job. My first thought was “piece of cake”. How hard can it be to go back to work, doing something that I love? Much bigger than I thought! I knew that I would miss my kids and I knew that it would have some difference in how I spent my time. I did not know that it would shake my world up to the degree it has.

A month ago I noticed that some of the things in life that I usually find enjoyable did not entertain me now. I had lost interest in reading and exercising. I was feeling checked out when I got home from work. Typically loving my time with my children had become a labor to engage them. Definitely not typical for someone that has enjoyed spending time with his kids for the last six years. I describe it as miniature depression. You can tell it is temporary, but at the same time have no clue how you got there.

I thought for a while that it will just disappear, but it wasn’t. I decided this weekend to step down into the snowy pit. I knew God had brought this into my life to raise something up and begin a healing process on it. As I invited God into this tough place I noticed him going after how I structure my time. See every other job I have had in the past has been very structured with a definite end goal to the day. My new current line of work allows more freedom. I noticed that Satan was using this freedom to fire up some guilt and shame. Frankly I just noticed! I could not see it for what it was early on.

No chicken soup story about walking out of this, but a step into the pit is what I sensed God wanting. Not that I have to win the battle today, but to step into the battle. Stepping into the battle allows God to go after something in my heart that only he can work on. I could choose a smaller battle and not allow God access to this tough place, but I saw what he wanted to go after.

So what’s the battle? Not the small battle, but the one that God will have to come through for you to win? Does he have a snowy pit that he wants you to step down into and face it. Take courage. Get some brothers around you and step into the battle.

Our Shimmering Self

For what shall we do when we wake one day to find we have lost touch with our heart and with it the very refuge where God’s presence resides?

Starting very early, life has taught all of us to ignore and distrust the deepest yearnings of our heart. Life, for the most part, teaches us to suppress our longing and live only in the external world where efficiency and performance are everything. We have learned from parents and peers, at school, at work, and even from our spiritual mentors that something else is wanted from us other than our heart, which is to say, that which is most deeply us. Very seldom are we ever invited to live out of our heart. If we are wanted, we are often wanted for what we can offer functionally. If rich, we are honored for our wealth; if beautiful, for our looks; if intelligent, for our brains. So we learn to offer only those parts of us that are approved, living out a carefully crafted performance to gain acceptance from those who represent life to us. We divorce ourselves from our heart and begin to live a double life. Frederick Buechner expresses this phenomenon in his biographical work, Telling Secrets:

[Our] original shimmering self gets buried so deep we hardly live out of it at all . . . rather, we learn to live out of all the other selves which we are constantly putting on and taking off like coats and hats against the world’s weather. (John Eldredge; The Sacred Romance , 5)

Balance

by Bob A Clifton

This last month my fascination in the Bible keeps coming back to my man Peter. Something about Peter and how willing he was to throw himself out there and see what comes back in return. My bible reading last week led me to another story of him in John 13. Jesus was enjoying an evening meal with his disciples. Jesus knew his time was drawing near and to better demonstrates for his disciples what it means to be a servant, he took to washing their feet. First up, Simon Peter, come on over you are the first contestant on “wash which foot?” Peter in all his intelligence asks “Lord, are you going to wash my feet?” Jesus realizing this seemed confusing to him explains that you probably won’t get the significance now, but in the future you will. In an abrupt fashion Peter tells him no. A New Testament bible scholar interprets the Greek as Peter saying “no, not never”.

I picture life like a teeter totter sometimes. Early in Christian walk I craved black and white explanation of the scriptures. “What does this mean” was a question I asked often. Followed up by, what exactly am I supposed to do in this situation”? I wanted the answer to fall on one side of the teeter totter or the other. Up or down, black or white, ying or yang. At this point in Peter’s story I get the idea that he is pretty adamant that he doesn’t want his feet washed. So persistent, he told Jesus no way!

Picking the story back up, Jesus reminds Peter that if he does not wash his feet Peter will have no part with me, the “me” being Jesus. It clicks for Peter at this point. And for Peter there is no way he is going to get left out of Jesus plan. So instead of saying “OK Jesus, wash away on the feet”. No Peter goes to the other side of the teeter totter with “not just my feet but my hands and my head as well”. In other words “come on with it”.

In the process of growing in my maturity, I can see plenty of situations where I went overboard. Sometimes I struggle with my prayer life. I remember leaving a bible study that talked about the importance of daily prayer. Well at that time I had no prayer life, so surely if I go pray three times a day I can make up for never praying. I may set out to fast for a meal and decide the only way too really get through to God is fast for the whole day. I have set out to volunteer, but instead of serving within my limits I find myself visiting with people or at church 4 nights out of the week.

What does it mean to strike a balance? Shawn’s last blog does a great job in expressing the need to take care of our self. In order to take care of ourselves we will need to strike the right balance. This issue of balance has surfaced again as our church looks at the spiritual disciplines. Taking a close look at these again has caused me to examine what are priorities in life. Some of the time I found that I was wasting was being wasted to worry or unstructured time where I have nothing to do.

How do you examine your balance? One thing I like to do is look at them through the lens of five different categories; Intellectual, Physical, Spiritual, Emotional, Economical. Taking a close look at these will often reveal chinks in the armor that could be better examined to determine how to correct and find more balance. I also like to ask close friends. A good friend of mine has been pressing up against me about my schedule for the last couple weeks. Trusting that he is not there to abuse me I have submitted my schedule to the microscope to get clarity from what he is saying. He was able to bring clarity to odds and ends that I could not put my finger on. Ask your wife? What does she think about the way you use your time?

I think we can learn from Peter. As we see Peter’s ministry develop in the book of Acts we find that he understands balance more as he matures in his faith.

What’s Your Self Care Plan?

by Shawn Martin

A couple nights ago I was talking with the Father about finding time for ‘rest’ each week; ‘me-time’. A time to unplug from everything that fights for my time and energy. All distractions gone; just quiet and the Father. I was hard-pressed to find any. Then just now, I picked up a copy of some powerpoint presentation I’ve had on my desk for months but haven’t read. Near the end of the copy, is a page titled, “Develop Your Own Self Care Plan”. The first two of three points were to spend plenty of quiet time alone and recharge your batteries daily. 

Is this brand new information? No. I’ve heard this dozens of times over the years in the field of service I work in. But the timing of the last 48 hours is what makes this a clear prompting from the Father. 

I would suspect most of you feel like there aren’t enough hours in the day. My last bi-monthly letter mentioned how summer time is busier than any other time for my family. Besides everything else, I’ve got a list of 46 projects that need to be done to our old farm house. It’s so overwhelming that I just don’t even want to start. There’s a room in my house that has been slated to be my 'study'; my 'man room', for a number of years. Finally, this February I got the green light from my wife to remodel the room (Visualize Tim the Tool Man Taylor grunting). The plan was to have it completed by mid-April. About a month ago the sheetrock was finally hung, mudded and sanded. And I even hired that out cause I just didn’t have the time to do it myself. All that’s left is painting and laying in a floor – and I’ve done nothing for a month. 

Do I have a lot on my plate? – sure. Can I cut back in some places? – possibly. But the truth is that for months on end I have not focused on taking care of myself, emotionally. I sleep. I eat. I shower. But I’m not recharging my soul. I’m not making time for the things I desire, that excite my spirit. And over time that adds up to a mountain of complacency that spills over into all my relationships. I snap at my kids, I resent my wife, I go passive at work, I don’t spend time in the Word, I don’t spend time with the Father. And when that happens, the Enemy has very little trouble at taking me out in one area or another. 

Walking with God is a commitment and involves time, daily. And while I’m not diminishing the importance of reading the Bible and praying with the Father, what I do believe is that if you don’t take care of yourself (emotionally and physically), you can’t take care of others. Everything else suffers. I can read my Bible daily and all those other disciplines I wrote about last time, but if I’m not making time for me in ways that rest and recharge me – then I’m offering God the very minimum of what’s left in my energy and emotion tanks. The result is unfocused time in the Word and distracted time in prayer. And the hazy fog continues to follow me as I get further disconnected from life. 

What are you doing each week to make sure you can attend to yourself in quietness where there is just you and the Father? Does the thought of sitting in silence for any period of time make you squirm in your seat? As tired as I am, I could turn around and spend more borrowed energy planning some me-time activity, but for those of us who need more hours in the day, it begins, ironically, by spending some of that precious time doing nothing; being quiet. I know I have the ability to find 5-10 minutes in a day to get quiet. More would be a luxury, but any time is a start. At first you’ll find that your mind still seems to be racing with distraction – stick with it. You’re just sending your body into shock. Inactivity is foreign to it – stick with it. As you allow yourself time for rest and reflection you’ll begin to be able to offer more of yourself to the Father. As you free up more of yourself to the Father, the deeper he can work on your heart and that will transform every other area of your life. 

Desire

by Bob A. Clifton

In the 2006 movie “Rescue Dawn” based on a true story of Dieter Dengler, you get a glimpse of what desire can be about. Dieter was a German born citizen that in a senseless act of bad coordinates and heavy cloud cover his town in Black Forest is bombed. In the midst of this bombing one of the diver fighter pilots flew within feet of his home. In a brief exchange of glares Dieter met eye to eye with the man flying the war plane. Something about that exchange from his third floor attic bedroom convinced Dieter that he wanted to be a fighter pilot.
Dieter moved to the United States not knowing any English and had very little money. Dieter learned English and became a Navy fighter pilot. In 1965, forty minutes into Dieters first flight over Lous in Vietnam he was shot down. This is where the true story or heroism begins. Interrogated and abused as a prisoner, Dieter never lost his spirit.
The scene that impacted me the most was many days into his capture by Vietnamese military he was talking to a fellow American in the prison. Both starved because of small rations of food looked miserable, until the American asked him why he became a Navy fighter pilot. All of the sudden Dieter lights up and tells the story of the German fighter pilots flying over his home. All hunger and resentment of his capture was lost as he retold the story of his desire! His desire to become a fighter pilot led to a great heroic story that is worth the watch.
Desire led me to be a counselor. Before I was a believer I dated a young lady who had a father that worked at Menninger’s and a mother that was a Social Worker. I sat and listened to countless stories for hours of counseling. I could not explain it but I was fascinated with counseling and what it had to offer someone trapped in a place mentally they don’t want to be. Sixteen years old and struggling with maintaining the maturity of a seven year old I thought no way! Sparing you of the ups and downs, at thirty two years old I graduated with a Masters Degree as a Marriage Family Therapist and a relationship with Jesus Christ that humbles me daily. God indeed wants us to have desire.
Desire flowed through Peter’s life. I have grown to relate to and appreciate Peter. Peter had more things to say in the bible than all of the other apostles put together. Often we find Peter in these crazy predicaments. Walking on water, bad fishing, and poor swordsmanship; seem to plague Peter from reaching the authentic Christian life. Maybe not? As I journey in my faith farther what is the essence of Peter’s ministry that I appreciate is his willingness to take risk. I get the idea that risk has a lot to do with desire.
In a early book by John Eldredge called “Desire” he says “we all know the dilemma of desire, how awful it feels to open our hearts to joy, only to have grief come in. They go together. We know that. What we don’t know is what to do with it, how to live in this world with desire so deep in us.” Anyone you know that has given up on their desire because of how many things have gone wrong in their life? Maybe there family did not raise them to think of desire as a noble quality of character. Maybe they were shamed when they explained what they desired. Do we hold out on forming relationships because they might be taken from us? How about love, do we refuse love because it has only hurt to love in the past?
I heard once that the modern day American church is a great place to warehouse Christians. Keep them comfortable and keep them from dreaming and the most effective strategy to keep the gospel from entering the world has been executed. What helped Dieter be the only American prisoner to escape from the north Vietnamese prison camps was his optimism and loyalty. I think we need to consider waking that optimism of the gospel up in our fellow believers. What do your brothers and sisters in Christ desire? What makes them come alive?